Agent X Next Door

Forearms, biceps and chest of a bricklayer

Legs like tree roots, rippling strength

Agent X stood solid

He lived in a trailer house next door

A forest growing circles around his place and mine, sun rising

Wild geese overhead, we could almost make out the clamor of salmon hatchery

workers down the road

Here ya go John, he said stuffing a purple bud into a platinum bong

We sat on a nine foot wide cedar stump, giant thoughtful dwarves

It was going to be a good day

A couple beers, some marijuana, another human being for company

I asked him how things were going between him and the DEA

Same old shit, he said passing the pipe

Agent X hadn’t worked for the DEA for two years

Worked instead as a door hanger

Much safer than working in the field for the DEA

Resigned soon after discovering gunshot wounds through his shoulder

He tossed me a letter 

His resignation had never been processed

His job was waiting for him

I’ll never go back, he told me once, and I believed him

The letter contained two airline tickets, family passes to Disneyworld

and a check for 10 grand

A request to pick up his son from his ex, Take a trip to Orlando,

Take in a confession or a consession or two 

I’m not sure what to do

Let me see those bullet scars again I asked

From what he told me, working for the DEA wasn’t all that bad

except for shooting people and them shooting back

He was a linguist, a translator

He translated confessions from captured South American drug runners

secretly imported by Texas rangers

Hard to understand them most of the time

With teeth busted out and their faces so swollen 

We’re the nice guys, he insisted

It’s the Texas Rangers who do the most damage

They all have fingers and teeth missing and they have no mercy

First thing they do is beat the shit out of them

then I go in and get the confession

Sometimes they drag them across the border by their hair,

Hush Hush- it’s all on the down low

After a thorough beating by the Texas angers, they are happy to go to prison

We get the best drugs in this country, he said, puffing away smirking

The agents get all the best shit and we split it up between us

We sat watching the super bowl a couple weeks later

During half-time I asked if he was going back

Dude, Epcot was great, then they flew me to Athens for a physical

Another letter had come

He picked it up and waved it at me

John I just can’t pass this up

You wouldn’t believe the benefit package they’re offering me

Have fun in the jungle, Killer

Agent X pulled a semi-automatic out from a strap on his leg

It’ll be my pleasure, he said, dipping the barrel into the guacamole

I’m leaving in the morning, I won’t be back, this is a long term thing

We had one last smoke together while the men knocked it up on television

Weekend war for the masses and I was losing a friend to the other side, come Monday

You just can’t trust those people